You Were Never Caught, But We Both Know What You Did

You can go ahead and continue to live your life, and I'll continue to live mine. But I hope one day you realize what you've done, and it won't be me you'll be seeking forgiveness from, you'll need to forgive yourself, which will be even harder to do.

I had hoped, in the time since it occurred that I could find justice for what you did to me.

I didn't.

I wanted to be one of those people who broke the stigma surrounding rape and pushed to have the blame placed firmly on rapists, not the victims.

I couldn't.

But you were allowed to walk free, without even stepping foot into a courtroom, or feeling even a minute of the guilt or shame that I've dealt with. I've spent so much time mulling over what you did to me on that dreadful night and if I had to sum it up, I'd say it was utterly traumatic. You inflicted upon me something no person on earth should ever have to suffer through.

I've finally decided that it's time to let all these emotions that I have deep inside— the hurt, anger and anxiety, I have go for good. I'm done giving you power over me. I'm letting go of the fear I carry.

I'm done giving it a second thought and done letting my anxiety from this situation run my life, because the longer I sit here and contemplate what happened, and the more I let my anxiety get out of control, the longer my sentence is in the prison you've built for me.

You're the one who should be in jail. both literally behind bars, and mentally imprisoned by guilt from what you've done. Not me!

I won't suffer another day. Today I cut off all ties to this horrific event. Today is the last time I'll give you the power and control you so desperately want. You may have taken something from me that day, but today I've gotten my courage back and I've gained something that I never knew could come out of such a traumatic experience. It's a newfound confidence and new lease of life that fills me with such joy. It's my promise to myself, a promise that I won't take life for granted ever again!

Today is the day that you finally don't matter anymore.

#MeToo